I'll chip in my 2 cents.

I think we should learn to discriminate based on the criteria in the sastra. Bhagavad Gita gives so many descriptions of what the qualities of an advanced devotee are. For example an advanced devotee is not interested in sense gratification. So we can see if a particular person is having symptoms of being very interested in sense gratification they are not very advanced. This is a general principle that we should learn to discriminate based on the scripture, and to do that we have to learn what the scripture says. Then we can give up this kind of superstitious fear based criteria for our actions. This to me is a key feature of Krsna consciousness, to understand the scripture and to act accordingly.

I believe firmly that no one group has a monopoly on Krsna consciousness. Nor does belonging to any particular group "save one". One can be in really good association and not take advantage. Lord Caitanya had a servant at one point who fell in to maya even though he had Lord Caitanya's personal association. What better association could there be? Walking a Krsna conscious path has more to it than simply joining a particular group and doing what they say to do. In my view it is more important how we act in our life than what group we belong to or what guru we have.

I think it is also a good thing to be honest about our situation. If we are still attached materially then it is not particularly relevant to us what our siddha deha is. It is simply an intellectual exercise. We should be honest about what our position is and not try to look for some simplistic way to pole vault ourselves on to the spiritual platform. If we are not following the basic principles then that is the first step we should aspire to. It has all been described nicely by Srila Rupa Gosvami what the steps of self realization are.

First comes faith. Then comes good association. Then comes practicing the principles of devotional service. Then comes dropping off of material attachment and anarthas or unwanted things. It goes on from there but I think it is a very rare soul who has gone beyond this point. You can tell good association by the fact that they are very interested in hearing and chanting about Krsna. That is the most important thing to them. And also that they are following the regulative principles.

OK I'll step off my soap box now. : )